What is Abuse?

The United Nations (Commission on the Status of Women, 1993) defines violence against women as:

“…any act of gender-based violence that results in, or is likely to result in, physical, sexual or psychological harm or suffering to women, including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty whether occurring in public or private life.”

Woman with her hand on her head, talking to a counsellor at Baldwin House.

Defining Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence

Abuse or violence that takes place within a domestic household. Can be between romantic partners, roommates, adult siblings, and can take the form of Elder Abuse where an elderly person is being abused by a live-in caretaker.

Intimate Partner Violence

Specifically abuse or violence between romantic partners (or recent ex-partners) They do NOT need to live together. 

Teen Dating Violence

Abuse or violence within a romantic relationship where at least one partner is under 18 years old.

Gender Based Violence

Gender-based violence is violence directed against a person because of that person's gender or violence that affects persons of a particular gender (usually female) disproportionately.

Understanding Abuse

Domestic Violence (also called family violence and partner assault) is rarely a one-time occurrence. It usually takes place as part of a cycle that includes the following phases:

Cyclic graphic.

Tension-Building

Insults and other verbal attacks; minor abusive situations; victim tries to be compliant, “walks on eggshells,” and feels helpless; atmosphere becomes increasingly more oppressive.

Violent Episode

Built-up tensions erupt into incidents ranging from severe verbal/emotional abuse to physical/sexual assault and can last from a few minutes to a few days, depending on the relationship. It is during this time that a woman is most likely to be seriously injured or killed by her partner.

Honeymoon Stage

Following a violent episode the abuser is usually contrite and attentive; the victim once again recognizes the person she first fell in love with and may be inclined to believe their partner’s promises to change.

Unless there is some form of intervention, the cycle usually repeats itself with the violent episodes escalating in frequency and intensity.

Types of Abuse

Abuse is an attempt to control the behaviors of another person. It is a misuse of power, which uses the bonds of intimacy, trust and dependency to make the victim vulnerable.

Physical

Sexual

Verbal / Emotional / Psychological Abuse

Financial

Spiritual

Digital Abuse

Reproductive Coercion

Take the Relationship Test

  1. In your relationship, have you ever experienced verbal abuse, including put-downs or threats?
  2. Have you suffered physical violence such as hitting, pushing, pulling hair, forced sexual contact?
  3. Has your partner threatened to leave you if you don’t do as they ask?
  4. Does your partner try to isolate you from family and friends?
  5. Is your partner bossy; do they try to control who you see and what you do?
  6. Does your partner use guilt trips to get their own way?
  7. Do you have to explain your whereabouts?
  8. Does your partner have a bad temper and a history of violence? Do they brag about mistreating others?
  9. Does your partner blame you when they treat you badly?
  10. Does your partner have a history of bad relationships?
  11. Does your partner believe that their sex (male or female) should be in control of their partner and family?
  12. Does your partner treat you “like dirt” or humiliate you in front of friends and family?
  13. Are you afraid of your partner? Do you worry about how they will react to what you say or do?
  14. Does your partner abuse alcohol or drugs?
  15. Have your friends or family warned you about your partner or told you they were worried about your safety?

If you answered "Yes" to ANY of the above questions, your relationship might be abusive. Don’t ignore or minimize these warning signs. Get help now. You can call Maison Baldwin House’s 24-hour Crisis Line at 613-938-2958 or 1-800-267-1744

We're Here for You 24 Hours a Day.

Providing you with a safe shelter and services to start living the life that you deserve.

Woman talking on the phone.Woman with her head in her hands as she talks to a counsellor at Baldwin House.Woman holding her baby.
Woman talking on the phone.Woman with her head in her hands as she talks to a counsellor at Baldwin House.Woman holding her baby.
Women laughing as they talk in a support group.Woman sitting with a counsellor at Baldwin House.Women looking down as she sits with other women in a support group.
Women laughing as they talk in a support group.Woman sitting with a counsellor at Baldwin House.Women looking down as she sits with other women in a support group.